If you’ve typed some version of “how to get started writing your life stories” into Google, you may not be looking to write the next great memoir. You’re looking for something simpler. A way to get the stories in your head, the ones your kids ask about at dinner, the ones you tell the same way every time, down on paper before they’re gone.
The good news: you don’t need to be a writer to do this. And you don’t need a grand plan to write a full memoir. You just need a place to start, and a small, doable way in. So, here it is …
Why “Writing My Memoir” Is the Wrong Goal
Most people who want to preserve their life stories stall before they begin, because they’ve set the bar at “memoir.” A memoir sounds like a 300-page project with a narrative arc, a publisher, and years of work. No wonder the question of how to get started writing your life stories feels overwhelming when that’s the target.
But that’s not actually what most families want. They want the story about how you met your first best friend. The one about the summer job that taught you everything about money. The story of the day you got the phone call that changed your life. These are short stories, not chapters. And short stories are a project you can actually finish. Just write one at a time.
This is the part almost everyone misses when they start searching for advice: the goal was never a finished book. It was a handful of true, specific memories, written down before they’re lost. Once you let go of “memoir” as the bar, the whole project gets smaller. Once it’s more manageable, suddenly, it becomes possible.
The Simplest Answer to How to Get Started Writing Your Life Stories
If there’s one piece of advice that matters more than any other, it’s this: stop trying to plan the whole thing. You don’t need an outline. And you don’t need to decide where the story “begins.” You need one memory and 10-20 minutes.
Start With One Question, Not One Life
The reason most people freeze up in front of a blank page is that they’re trying to answer an impossible question: “What’s the story of my life?” That’s too big for anyone to tackle at once.
Instead, start with one small, specific question:
- What did your childhood bedroom look like?
- Who taught you how to work hard?
- What’s a decision you made that surprised everyone, including you?
- How did you meet your partner?
- What lessons do you hope you’ve taught your children and grandchildren?
One question. One memory. One page, maybe two (or three). That’s it. You’re not writing your entire life story. You’re writing a series of stories from your life. The difference matters, because it makes the whole thing possible.
Think about the way you already tell stories out loud. Nobody sits their family down and says, “Let me tell you my life story.” They say, “Did I ever tell you about the time…” That’s the format. That’s the entire method behind how to get started writing your life stories: one “did I ever tell you about the time” at a time.
Give Yourself Permission to Write It Badly
Family stories don’t need polish. Nobody who reads your grandmother’s story about crossing the country in a station wagon cares if the sentences are perfectly structured. They care that she wrote it, in her own words, in her own voice. That’s the entire value of the thing.
So skip the pressure to write “well.” Write the way you’d tell the story out loud to someone you love, and then just get it onto the page. If you find yourself editing every sentence before you finish the paragraph, that’s a sign to slow down and let the words be rough. You can always tidy a sentence later. You can’t tidy a story that was never written at all.
This is often the real answer to how to get started writing your life stories: give yourself permission to write badly, on purpose, every single time.
Build a Small, Repeatable Habit
The people who actually finish this kind of project rarely sit down and write for six hours straight. They do it in small, repeated sessions, one story at a time, on a schedule that fits their life. 10-20 minutes on a Sunday morning. One story a week. A story a month, if that’s what works.
The habit matters more than the pace. Slow and steady gets the stories written. Waiting for a free weekend does not, because that weekend rarely comes, and even when it does, a blank afternoon is a much harder place to start than a scheduled 10-20 minutes.
You could start with a prompt that already exists in your week, a cup of tea on Sunday morning, the drive home from your grandchild’s soccer game, and attach the habit to it. A habit that’s tied to something you already do is far more likely to survive past week one.
Use Prompts Instead of a Blank Page
If you’ve ever sat down determined to write and found yourself staring at nothing, you already know the real obstacle isn’t motivation. It’s the blank page itself. A good prompt solves that problem instantly, because it hands you a starting point instead of asking you to invent one. It turns “how to get started writing your life stories” from an open-ended question into a simple task: read the card, answer the question, done.
This is exactly why I created Stories Between Us, a deck of 52 prompt cards paired with a keepsake journal, designed to get you writing your life stories one simple question at a time. No blank page. No pressure to write a memoir. Just one card, one memory, one short story, one after the other, until you’ve built something your family will keep for generations.
Each card is designed to unlock a specific memory rather than a vague theme, so instead of freezing in front of “tell me about your childhood,” you get something you can actually answer: “What’s a smell that instantly takes you back?” or “What’s the best piece of advice you ever got and who gave it to you?”
The journal that comes with the deck gives each story a home, with space to write your notes and stories, a line for the date, and topic. Together, the cards and journal remove every excuse that usually stands between “I should really write my stories down” and actually doing it.
Your Stories Don’t Need to Be Finished to Matter
One last thing worth saying: you don’t need to complete all 52 stories for this to be worthwhile. Even 5 finished stories are 5 more than most families will ever have. Start with one. Then see where it takes you.
If you’re ready to stop wondering how to get started and simply begin, Stories Between Us is designed to make the first story the easiest one you write. Join the waitlist now!
Remember – Your story matters. Write it down, pass it on.
You may also enjoy this post about beginning your life stories.
About the Author
Hi, I’m Lyndall Guinery-Smith, your Life Story Facilitator. After more than two decades helping businesses find their voice at The Professional Writer, I’ve shifted my focus to follow a deeper calling: helping you share your life stories.
At the Life Story Collective, I guide people through rediscovering their memories and shaping them into treasured keepsakes for the future. I truly believe that putting your life into words is a powerful way to make sense of your journey, connect with the people you love, and build a legacy that lasts. Whether you’re unsure where to start or ready to dive straight in, my role is to make the experience simple, inspiring, and rewarding for you. I can’t wait to help you begin.